By Granger Whitelaw
It’s funny how some of the real truths of life pass from generation to generation, Grandfather to Grandson, Mother to child. One of these great truths was passed to me again yesterday from my Mother, I had forgot the last time she shared this with me, but this time it made a lot more sense.
In love – or better put – in marriage (relationships of any type really), it needs to be a 60/60 thing. In other words, you each need to put in 60% to make it work. Now we all know 60 + 60 = 120, so this is an unattainable number, but that is where it makes sense. Because it is “in the 10% overlap from each of you” that you will find peace and unity.
Having been married twice and in a few long relationships before and between, I gotta tell ya – this can work. Just think about it – it’s not 50/50… it’s 60/60. That means YOU need to make an extra 10% effort to take out the trash, or give her a break from the kids – let him stay out a bit later to have a meeting or just hang with his friends a bit. When she needs to talk, stop and listen and when he needs a hand – extend it to him.
Now I am not a relationship expert – geez – far from it. But I know when I think it’s 50/50 it seems easier to blame my partner, my lover or my wife. But when it’s 60/60 – I know I need to do a little more before I start pointing fingers or giving up.
Give that extra 10% – each of you – and I promise, it will add up to more than 120.
And thanks Mom (and Grandpa Bear who taught this to her) for sharing this truth with me. If you enjoyed this week’s blog, you might enjoy My Weekly Thoughts from last week.
22 April, 2012